Putting MYSELF out on the line.

Hello!

I’m sorry I’ve been slacking so badly with keeping my blog up to date.  I started this blog because I thought it would be helpful for me to write about my Health journey, but I realized I only want to share my success and not my failures.  When I slip up I already feel like I fail myself so why would I want to widely announce it to everyone?  Because I need to be accountable!

In February 2010 when I decided to start this journey to becoming healthier, thinner, and happier it was something I didn’t know I could accomplish.  I’m not one to believe in myself when it comes to weight loss because in the past when I’ve attempted to lose weight if it didn’t work quickly I gave up.  I realize weight doesn’t come off over night just like it didn’t pile on over night, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t want the impossible like many others in my situation.  However when I started out watching my calorie intake with “LoseIt!” and working out nightly with a good friend the weight started to come off!  I lost 4 pounds my first week and 4 pounds the second week.  I couldn’t have been happier with that, I mean clearly it was working.  I continued to lose weight every week for months!  I never felt like I was hungry or depriving myself which made it that much easier.  I wasn’t exactly noticing differences in my appearance, but people kept complimenting me on how much thinner I looked and that just made me the happiest!

Then February 2011 (this year) for some reason I fell off the wagon with my eating and exercise.  I stopped counting calories and stopped caring about what I was eating and how much of it I was eating like my old habits.  I kept telling myself you still fit in your size 6 jeans so it’s no big deal.  Then I stopped being able to wear my size 6 jeans and I kept saying it’s all right I’m still small.  Well I’m wearing my size 8 jeans which still make me happy from the 13-14 size I wore before I first started this journey, BUT I’m up 18.4 pounds exactly from last Thanksgiving!  I’m getting heavy again and unhappy with myself.  I’m getting teary just writing this.  I know I’m better than this and I know I deserve better for myself. 

I have barely weighed myself from March to now because I knew I’d be disappointed that all that hard work I put into losing 30 pounds was ruined.  Every time I attempt to start eating healthier, lower calories again and working out it doesn’t feel like it did the first time, it doesn’t feel doable.  It’s stupid because I know I can be successful at weight loss, but I love food.  I have no reason to lie about it because the fact that I’m a little chubby speaks for itself.  I realize I’m not morbidly obese, but after seeing the way I was at my heaviest weight I will NEVER get that way again!

My eating is still crap and I need to get it under control.  But, I’ve been successful with exercise lately.  I figure if I can stay focused on one of the two for now I’m happy.  The past 5 weeks I’ve been doing the Couch to 5k app on my iPhone.  I’ve successfully made it to week 5 without having to alter the program in anyway.  It’s getting to the tough part of the program where I have to run for about 20 minutes without walking or stopping and I’ve never done that before EVER!  I’ll tell you though I’m going to push myself with everything I have inside of me because I’m determined to accomplish this goal I’ve set for myself.  I’ve asked my sister in law Shawna to run a 5k with me in January to start out the New Year the right way!  Based on the time I started this program if I can stay on track like I have been for 5 weeks I’ll finish the training program the week of Christmas so I’ll be good to run a 5k in January! 

For those of you thinking that’s great that you are exercising, but eating healthy is just as important…I already know that!  But, that doesn’t make it any easier for me!  I’m doing what I can for myself right now and I’m happy that I’m still improving myself.  Changing a lifestyle like mine was never going to be something that happened over night and I should have known it wouldn’t come without obstacles.  I just have to learn to overcome them.  I realize I’ve had a major setback gaining back some of the weight I’ve lost, but I will not let this stop me from getting what I want.  It may take longer than it should have or I wanted it to, but that doesn’t mean I won’t appreciate it just as much when I finally get there.

This is my weight loss chart below.  I only weighed in on "LoseIt!" or "MyFitnessPal" on Monday's.

  

  16-Feb-10          185.4

15-Mar-10	174.2
22-Mar-10	174.3
25-Mar-10	172.7
26-Mar-10	171.7
27-Mar-10	171.7
28-Mar-10	172.5
29-Mar-10	171.8
30-Mar-10	172.2
31-Mar-10	171.8
5-Apr-10	172.1
7-Apr-10	172
8-Apr-10	170.2
10-Apr-10	169.4
11-Apr-10	169
12-Apr-10	168.8
15-Apr-10	167.8
16-Apr-10	166.7
17-Apr-10	167.6
18-Apr-10	167
19-Apr-10	167.3
22-Apr-10	168
23-Apr-10	167.4
24-Apr-10	166.9
25-Apr-10	166.7
26-Apr-10	167.2
27-Apr-10	166.4
28-Apr-10	166.1
29-Apr-10	165.6
30-Apr-10	165.7
1-May-10	164.3
3-May-10	165
4-May-10	165.5
5-May-10	164.4
6-May-10	164.7
7-May-10	163.2
8-May-10	163.6
10-May-10	163.5
11-May-10	163.3
12-May-10	163.9
13-May-10	165.4
14-May-10	164.6
15-May-10	164.5
16-May-10	163.5
17-May-10	162.9
18-May-10	162.4
19-May-10	161.8
20-May-10	161.2
21-May-10	161.8
22-May-10	161.9
23-May-10	161.6
24-May-10	161.7
25-May-10	160.9
26-May-10	160.9
27-May-10	161
28-May-10	160.9
29-May-10	160.4
30-May-10	160.4
31-May-10	160.9
1-Jun-10	161.5
2-Jun-10	160.4
3-Jun-10	161.3
4-Jun-10	160.3
5-Jun-10	159.3
6-Jun-10	161.3
7-Jun-10	161
8-Jun-10	159
9-Jun-10	158.9
10-Jun-10	158.8
11-Jun-10	157.6
12-Jun-10	158.5
13-Jun-10	158.3
14-Jun-10	157.7
15-Jun-10	159.2
16-Jun-10	158.9
17-Jun-10	158.2
18-Jun-10	158.2
19-Jun-10	157.2
20-Jun-10	158.2
21-Jun-10	158.2
22-Jun-10	157.8
23-Jun-10	156.8
24-Jun-10	156.5
25-Jun-10	156.1
26-Jun-10	156.6
27-Jun-10	155.9
28-Jun-10	155.8
29-Jun-10	154.7
30-Jun-10	155.6
1-Jul-10	156.1
2-Jul-10	155.3
3-Jul-10	155.2
12-Jul-10	158
13-Jul-10	157.6
14-Jul-10	156.7
15-Jul-10	156.2
16-Jul-10	155.2
17-Jul-10	154.8
18-Jul-10	154.9
19-Jul-10	154.4
20-Jul-10	153.9
21-Jul-10	153.8
22-Jul-10	155.1
23-Jul-10	155.5
28-Jul-10	155.6
29-Jul-10	154.8
30-Jul-10	154.9
31-Jul-10	154.9
1-Aug-10	155.4
2-Aug-10	154.6
3-Aug-10	155.4
4-Aug-10	154.7
5-Aug-10	154.7
6-Aug-10	154.4
7-Aug-10	156.8
9-Aug-10	155.1
10-Aug-10	154.4
16-Aug-10	154.7
17-Aug-10	156
19-Aug-10	154
20-Aug-10	153.5
21-Aug-10	154.3
22-Aug-10	155
24-Aug-10	155.6
25-Aug-10	154.8
26-Aug-10	155.7
3-Sep-10	156.3
5-Sep-10	156.8
7-Sep-10	158
13-Sep-10	157.6
14-Sep-10	157.3
16-Sep-10	157.7
19-Sep-10	157
20-Sep-10	157.1
22-Sep-10	156.7
23-Sep-10	156.2
24-Sep-10	156.3
28-Sep-10	157.2
29-Sep-10	156.9
30-Sep-10	157
1-Oct-10	157.4
4-Oct-10	154.8
6-Oct-10	154.8
11-Oct-10	158
12-Oct-10	157.4
13-Oct-10	157.6
18-Oct-10	158.2
19-Oct-10	159.4
20-Oct-10	158.2
21-Oct-10	157.5
22-Oct-10	157.2
24-Oct-10	157.7
26-Oct-10	156.2
28-Oct-10	156.9
2-Nov-10	158.8
3-Nov-10	158.4
8-Nov-10	157.9
16-Nov-10	160.4
17-Nov-10	159.5
18-Nov-10	158.7
19-Nov-10	157.5
20-Nov-10	156.2
22-Nov-10	156.4
24-Nov-10	155.9
28-Nov-10	158.4
1-Dec-10	156.9
13-Dec-10	162
20-Dec-10	159
27-Dec-10	161.7
28-Dec-10	160.9
29-Dec-10	159.9
30-Dec-10	159.3
31-Dec-10	159.4
3-Jan-11	161.5
4-Jan-11	160.9
5-Jan-11	159.5
6-Jan-11	158.3
7-Jan-11	157.4
8-Jan-11	158.5
9-Jan-11	157.6
10-Jan-11	156.6
11-Jan-11	158.1
12-Jan-11	156.8
13-Jan-11	156.8
14-Jan-11	156.4
15-Jan-11	155.6
16-Jan-11	155.6
17-Jan-11	158.6
18-Jan-11	157.4
19-Jan-11	156.6
20-Jan-11	155.8
21-Jan-11	155.2
22-Jan-11	156.5
23-Jan-11	155.9
24-Jan-11	154.8
25-Jan-11	154.7
26-Jan-11	155.3
27-Jan-11	153.6
28-Jan-11	153.4
29-Jan-11	152.7
30-Jan-11	154.8
31-Jan-11	154.5
1-Feb-11	155
2-Feb-11	154.3
3-Feb-11	154.6
4-Feb-11	154.3
7-Feb-11	156.8
21-Feb-11	160.8
23-Feb-11	159.3
2-Mar-11	160
3-Mar-11	159.8
9-Mar-11	160.3
10-Mar-11	158.9
12-Mar-11	158
14-Mar-11	159.1
16-Mar-11	158.9
24-Oct-11	172.9
25-Oct-11	171.9
26-Oct-11	170.5
7-Nov-11	173.7
24-Nov-11	174.3
~Katie